Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
