i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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