is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
