so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
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The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Randomize