Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Randomize