I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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