Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
We are all done wearing pants today
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
