dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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