so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Randomize
