Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
