I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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