just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
he's gonorrhea incarnate
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
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