Texts From Last Night

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  (512): View more from Texas

  Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good

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  (512): Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good http://tfl.nu/r9g3
  Replies (5) Good night (1537) Bad night (577)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to

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  (267): If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to http://tfl.nu/tvy7
  Replies (59) Good night (4961) Bad night (1279)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I

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  (516): Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I<3 NY. http://tfl.nu/f30c
  Replies (54) Good night (5081) Bad night (560)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.

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  (206): I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right. http://tfl.nu/kss9
  Replies (16) Good night (5865) Bad night (1006)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.

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  (304): There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time. http://tfl.nu/tmab
  Replies (34) Good night (1861) Bad night (5028)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."

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  (717): She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen." http://tfl.nu/c7q3
  Replies (32) Good night (9545) Bad night (1020)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...

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  (360): Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told... http://tfl.nu/tfwr
  Replies (6) Good night (2553) Bad night (995)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.

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  (701): Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle. http://tfl.nu/xafh
  Replies (9) Good night (1364) Bad night (2004)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.

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  (720): She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship. http://tfl.nu/wvbn
  Replies (15) Good night (549) Bad night (1459)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Coming.

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  (318): I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this. (504): Coming. http://tfl.nu/0nn7
  Replies (8) Good night (1363) Bad night (436)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.

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  (+44): Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms. http://tfl.nu/2jzl
  Replies (7) Good night (656) Bad night (256)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.

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  (813): I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible. http://tfl.nu/s9e0
  Replies (1) Good night (883) Bad night (294)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!

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  (305): Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!! http://tfl.nu/q8an
  Replies (4) Good night (813) Bad night (269)
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  (518): View more from New York

  THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason

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  (518): THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason http://tfl.nu/3zx2
  Replies (4) Good night (402) Bad night (682)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....

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  (613): He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad.... http://tfl.nu/p0ok
  Replies (3) Good night (349) Bad night (794)

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