This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
