R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Randomize