you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
