Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
