maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
