I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
