But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize