she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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