Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Apparently you make a good broom.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Drake has all the answers
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
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