trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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