Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
