Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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