Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
