one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
He told me they were just razor bumps!
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
