I wannas sexs uuuuu
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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