So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
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