I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
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Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.