Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
