turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
