Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize