I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
