I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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