She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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