bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize