i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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