I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
