You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
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