So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
i came on her dog
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
