Your mouth is God's brothel.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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