he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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