is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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