you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
