on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize
