no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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