Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots