I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
