I wish I could teleport
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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