omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Found the puke drawer
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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