the new term for farting is butt boxing.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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